lydibug's Diaryland Diary ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Scuba I am at my parents house becuase my new boyfriend has a problem with follow through and when I asked him to follow through on something he started making up lame excuses that pissed me off and so I came here. Where people seem to like me and want to spend time with me. I sound like such a baby. Maybe I'm just hormonal, but sometimes a girl just really needs to feel loved. Thank goodness I live close to my family. Speaking of feeling loved, yesterday Max and I had an amazing journey to B1g Sur with a brief pitstop at the M0nterey Bay Aquarium. It was quite lovely. We drove and we talked and listened to mix tapes from years past (as my new car only has a tape player... wtf?) and walked in the stream (against my better judgement) and had some drinks and watched some tacky old people in swim suits and fanny packs. It was good times. I believe dear Max is going to post pictures somewhere on the information super duper highway, at which time I will provide a link here. Aaaaaaaaaaaaaanyhoo. Today started out well enough. Steve came over, brought me flowers, said he was sorry for being a dick, etc. Then we went and had lunch with his family. I adore his family. THE coolest group of people. You feel totally comfortable with them and they're all just really cool and nice and funny and loose and free and happy. Gawd. Why does he have to suck so bad? His family is so awesome. Then we went home (this is the first time I have seen him in about 5 days mind you... witht he exception of the lame fight we had last night where I went up to his house to drop off the rest of his shit) and took a nap and then he fed me some line about something and said he was going to go home and bla bla bla. It was so lame. I'm so fed up. Follow through is one of my biggest issues. If you don't follow through, I don't deal with you. FUUUUUUUCK. He's so rad, but then so not rad at the same time. I feel as though I'm regressing. Letting bullshit happen. I was doing so good at not letting bullshit happen. Anyway. Since I got my new car, I'm broke. Broker than broke. I got some more hours at work but its still barely enough to get by. Honestly, I know I'm constantly griping about how broke I am, but its true, and I don't know how I manage to do it every month. My friends are all in New York. If it were cheaper, I'd up and move. Gina, Kari and Nicole are all going to be there as of September. I think I'm destined to end up there. Anyway, I just needed to get away and write. I didn't want to call anybody and unload, I just needed a change of scenery. The virgo in me tends to want to overanalyze everything and that becomes quite taxing on my mind. The 2 hour nap I took is not going to help me get to bed any sooner. Fuck. Stupid Steve. Alright. I'm off. Peace out. Hopefully I'll have something happier to post later. xoxo -Lydia 8:36 pm - Sunday, Aug. 29, 2004 ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- |
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