Back at camp again. I wish I didn't have to come here so often. Although I pig out on all the sweets I want, I often feel quite gross afterwords. Not to mention the fact that I become an evil, pyscho bitch from hell with attitude plus. Eh. Deal with it. I wanted to wear my "Pissy" shirt to work today, but didn't think it would be looked upon too kindly. Although it would have given anyone who passed by fair warning.

Moving day is getting close. Getting a little nervous about things. And I finally broke down and wrote to my dad to see if he could send some help. I feel like such a giant loser when I do this. But hell, I'm a full time student. I work my ass off. Most college kids (who have parents that can afford it) don't have to work while they're in school. I'd like to think that I'm doing pretty well for myself here in the fast-paced Silicon Valley. The economy sucks and I'm barely hanging in there, but I get the job done.

I'll be moving during finals. Shitsville.

Ky gets home this Saturday and his mom asked if I was going to go down this Sunday. I don't know what to do. Of course I want to go. But, ... but...

ugh. Damn this conscience of mine. He's a good person and a good friend who's been off fighting a war. I just want to go see him and give him a hug and let him know how glad I am that he's home safely. Theres nothing wrong with that. Nothing at all.

Right?

I am SO TORN. Everything just needs to fall into place already. I have to be strong. Everything happens the way its supposed to.

Just breathe. One foot in front of the other. It'll be fine.

10:36 am - Thursday, May. 29, 2003

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